Were moving!

I decided to ditch this blog mostly because I enjoy my word press one more and its not just work based. So update your bookmarks/favorites to:
http://modologyworld.net/steph/

where my new blog is updated on a regular basis :)

Thanks!

A multitude of epic FAILS!

Dear God, today has got to be by and large the MOST heinous day I've had in a while! First off I find out my IAM page was TOS'd for something I didn't do. That however doesn't surprise me as Rachel is a power hungry twat...

Then I discover that someone shouldn't be trusted anymore which REALLY sucks!

Then I *almost* forget that today was good Friday and the bus schedule had changed, that however wasn't an issue. Then I go to work, the place is a tad bit messy and I have an abundance of orders to contend with first thing in the AM. Nothing I love more then making a ton of quiche for other people first thing in the morning blah!

*On a side note, I hate when people pronounce it wrong! Its QUICHE not kish or my personal favorite: a Guiche which in case you didn't know is a male genital piercing and makes me laugh every single time I hear someone call it that!*

Then I discover we have a tea party today, which had gotten forgotten about. So Donna asked me if I would mind running to Couche tard to grab some bread so we can make the sandwiches and grab some snacks for her and myself. So off I go, get what I need and of course upon my horror discover that I totally forgot to bring money with me! So that was a little embarassing to say the least! Thankfully its not far and I know the guys that work there to, but still!

Today was crazy busy! It was a constand non stop stream of people today who wanted tea and scones. Which is a utter pain in the ass, tons of dishes and a lot of work and most of us hardly think its worth it. Lunch however went over really well (creamy dilled salmon with lemon rice) which was nice seeing as how my day had gone to shit in so many ways throughout the say.

So i'm leaving work, forgot my dinner AND my pay ugrh! Thankfully Donna lives down the street and is willing to drop it off for me, bless her!

So anyway I get to the metro, almost home... Then I look up and the escalators are broken :P Now don't get me wrong I'm not *THAT* lazy BUT... My knee was killing me, its been a long week and I was tired and St. Henri metro has a whole Lotta stairs! So thank God for Catholics because we score a long weekend which means not work for me on Monday but I still get paid, YAY!

OMGWTFBBQ!

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with people?

Something about Monday's Krystal & I always seem to get epically bitchy, snotty, arrogant (oh and I could go on) people.

Every Monday & Tuesday its the same shit: "Where's Donna?" For the 1 billionth time SHE DOESN'T WORK ON MONDAYS! Don't get me wrong, I love Donna to death but seriously WTF? The poor girl is FINALLY get some time off, deal with it, suck it up and if it bothers you THAT much then how about coming in on a day that she works OK.

So this snotty asshole comes in and asks for our tea selection box, that's fine Krystal brings it to him. Which he should consider himself lucky to get served at all because usually during lunch time we don't serve just tea & dessert and/or scones because your 5 dollar cheap ass is taking up room for people who actually want to spend more money.

Anyway they select a tea to share, fine. When they came up to the counter to pay snotty ass says to Krystal:" I think you gave us jasmine tea instead of dragon's well." She says no it was the one you requested and I know that because I seen her making it for one thing and Jasmine tea isn't served in a tea pot its served in a tea carafe. Its also a blossom, dragons well which is green tea is just straight up loose tea. Prick!

So Mr. I *think* I'm the ultimate tea connoisseur says loud enough for her to hear" They said they gave us the right tea, must have been our noses." Well yeah jackass if you didn't snort so much coke then maybe you'd have a better sense of taste!

OK not even my story but I have PMS and that pissed me off! I don't like seeing my co-workers getting shit on like that by some jerkwad who shouldn't be there because Starbucks apparently is more "his style".

Then on come the coffee complaints...

Fat bitch: "Girls, your coffee isn't strong enough."
Me: um hmm, and I just shrugged.
Fat Bitch: " Did you hear me? Even the indicator looks like the color of tea."
Krystal: "Don't go by the indicator because it's not accurate." (and its not either.)
Fat Bitch: "Well maybe you'll listen to my friend here humph."

Fat bitches friend: "The coffee isn't strong enough *whiny bitchy voice*."
Me: "Yeah? Well I make it the same way everyday and there's nothing I can do about it, its an automatic coffee maker, therefore I have no control over it."
Fat bitches friend: "Well you can control how much coffee you put in there *snotty smirk* "
Me: *returns snotty smirk* "Well no because its all pre-measured and pre-packed according to the machine that we use."
Fat bitches friend: " Well you can add less water then *again bitchy snotty smirk."
Me: *starting to glare at whiny bitch* "Um no, you see its an AUTOMATIC MACHINE which is hooked up to our plumbing and it automatically dispenses the correct amount of water."
Fat bitches friend: " So your telling me its not your fault? Enter Bitchy snorting sound teamed up with yet ANOTHER dirty look."
Me: *at the end of my rope and not caring how bitchy I sound...* "Why yes that's exactly it because I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER THE MACHINE!"

Seriously, WTF part of I have zero control over it doesn't that bevy of stupid twats NOT understand. Thanks for your suggestions you stupid bitches but this isn't a coffee machine like you have at home, its a commercial model. If you have THAT much of a problem with the coffee, please feel free to contact our supplier and in the meantime go fuck yourself with the stick you have up your ass.

Jesus Christ!

For the 12 bucks your spending on your entire meal including salad, coffee/tea and dessert (which is all homemade in house) you really can't bitch. Yet they find something... Just because your husband thinks your a cunt too and doesn't want to put out is NOT my problem.

Looks like it's been a while...

I am most likely the most inconsistent blogger out there! I see the last time that I posted was back in August. I could sit here and write a novel about what's happened the last few months but quite honestly, I don't have the time, need, want nor desire to do so but I'll re-cap and post some highlights just for fun.

I started a new job yet again, seems like 2008 has been a total epic FAIL when it comes to work, at least for me. Mostly because I hated 98% of the places I worked at, only 2 being the exception. What can I say I'm a picky bitch and if I don't like the way things are done then I just pack it in and leave. After my latest stint as a sous Chef in Westmount I was pretty much ready to burn my Chef uniforms in effigy which I think may have given me some satisfaction.

Then I lucked out and found the most amazing job ever! I can honestly say for the first time in oh I dunno the last 16 years I've had a job I actually LIKE where I work and getting up in the morning no longer makes me want to stab myself in the eye with a plastic fork!

Some of my clients though do make me want to stab myself in the forehead with whatever sharp object I can get my hands on. My work is a tiny place which I enjoy quite a bit because its more personal and everything is homemade which I love! Not to mention the Monday-Friday 9-5 hours and the 4 weeks off a year. But sometimes the people that come in or call drive me absolutely FUCKING INSANE! I work by myself until roughly 11:30 in the morning, I don't have time to answer the phone because *YOU* want to know what the special of the day is, come in and find out! Or better yet, get yourself put on the mailing list and like magic the weeks menu will appear in your in box first thing Monday morning.
Then there's the stupid questions, that I ain't even going to get into because there's just TOO many of them. Bottom line is I'm busy trying to cook and have no time to deal with your dumb ass! If you have a LEGITIMATE question in regards to the food or my cooking methods because you have special dietary needs or allergies then I will be more then happy to do my best to accommodate you, if not well then FUCK OFF!

These are 2 of my favorite customer related moments:

Phone rings:
Is this Stephanie?
Yes
What's the special today?
Sliced ROAST pork with apricot glaze and mashed potatoes
What kind of pork is it?
I didn't realise there was more then one kind of pork... As far as I knew it all came from the same animal (insert sarcasm here)
Well is it roasted?
(notice how I said ROAST PORK when I answered the phone) Yes...
Well how is it made?
In the oven... (to myself I'm thinking stupid twat)
well how is it served?
(again I said sliced did I not, oh yes, indeed I most certainly did) Sliced with a glaze and mashed potatoes and salad as per the usual on a plate.
Oh... and the soup?
I don't know yet the phone won't stop ringing and I haven't had time to make it yet.
Oh, well you sound like you're busy (well DUH! not to mention seriously annoyed!)
Why yes I am, as I ALWAYS am this time of the day. (again dripping with sarcasm, I really hate this old bag)
Well I'll see you later for lunch then.
OK then, I'll see you later (enter the fake nice voice here)

Fast forward to lunch, I ended up making lentil soup because it's fast and ridiculously easy to make in a pinch.

So she asks my co-worker if she can taste it... Of course she doesn't like it because she HATES everything that we make yet keeps coming back WTF?

Then has the nerve to say:"what did Steph do open a can of Campbell's? I called at 10:30 and the soup wasn't made yet." My co-worker says no, Steph makes all of her soup from scratch (which I do). Keeping in mind that our lunch service doesn't start until NOON as in 12pm and it doesn't take me hours to make soup, this isn't the dark ages. Us less bitch, comes in once a week and totally insults EVERYTHING! So I stopped picking up the phone on Wednesdays because that's when she usually calls.

Generally I try to make lentil soup vegetarian, the boss lady doesn't exactly always approve of me "accommodating" vegetarians because were not a vegetarian restaurant but I am a firm believer that especially if your making a vegetable based soup then it should be VEGETARIAN. The boss lady LOVES chicken stock a little too much and likes to add it to my soup because she feels it needs more salt, then USE SALT THEN. Fuck we have salt on the table, people can add more if they wish. I don't like to over season my food because everyone likes it differently.
Anyway back to the lentil soup incident...

A woman comes in and has a total hissy fit because I had no more veggie stock on hand and used beef stock instead. You should have seen her! It was priceless! Her eyelashes were batting a mile a minute and she's says to my co-worker in a rather loud obnoxious voice:"HOW YOU COULD MAKE LENTIL SOUP BEEF BASED FOR? ITS SUPPOSED TO BE VEGETARIAN!?!"
Sensing my co-workers distress I came over and politely stated that actually no it IS generally beef based. She wheels around and screams at me:"WELL THE INDIAN PLACE I GO TO HAS VEGETARIAN LENTIL SOUP!"
I just gave her my look of utter disdain and said:" well generally *I* make it vegetarian (which I do) but today I wasn't able to because I didn't have adequate amounts of veggie stock on hand for one thing and I don't know if you've noticed or not but this *ISN'T* an Indian restaurant either."

She left in a huff, OK by me!...

Oh there's so much more which I will save for another day because I just spent the better part of 12 hours travelling from Christmas and its time for me to get some sleep.

Adventures in interview hell...

So come home from vacation find out my job has been eliminated, whatever I'll deal. The only true advantage to working in culinary is that people will always eat so you generally don't lack for work. So after my mom left, I started looking for a new job. I had 2 contacts from my prior job one of which I utilized and the other one actually had a ad up so I replied to that. I hate going to interviews overall they just suck in general. So I go on the first one in the plateau and the guy was a bit of a dick head and he kept staring at my chest the entire time. I don't care if that's what guys do, horribly unprofessional and a total turn off. He just kept saying mmmmmmm the kitchen is really small back there, while staring at my tits. Gee are you trying to tell me something here?

I have to pay rent but this place was a turn off from the get go. Onto job interview #2. Yeah that place was beneath my skill in too many ways. Yeah I know that sounds snotty but its true. I have skills dammit and I will not waste them on some hole in the wall place making clubs, screw that! Went to job interview 3 was nice, I liked it, had a good feeling about this place. Reminded me of my former job I liked that idea. Was told that he (the head Chef) wanted to talk to the owner and what not before committing to hiring me. However I was somewhat left with the impression that I wouldn't start until late August/beginning of September and that would have left me screwed for rent. Whatever I figured I would deal because I just had a good feeling about this place you know!

So onto job interview number 4, didn't feel right, I blew it off figured I was getting my panties in a knot over nothing. Nice place LOOKED classy in the dining room was a good position (executive Chef) money was decent and the like. Got hired on the spot but I still had this bad feeling that stayed with me. I had a few days to ponder this, still had a few interviews to go on. The others are uneventful and not worth mentioning really. I was getting burnt out and I thought screw it, I got hired anyway. I thought YAY I'm going to run a kitchen and it's going to be awesome, my opportunity to shine and be creative blah blah blah...

Yeah I was wrong... SO very WRONG!

This pretty much summed up my first day:

I come in, the owner didn't even remember my name for one thing. That was a little disturbing but I let it go. Then he became a a tad bit of a condescending bastard, again I let it go new jobs are generally like that in *some* kitchens, at least for me. Then he got a little up close and personal while I was trying to work DO NOT WANT! Yeah I know I'm not a size two, don't have a flat butt and yeah my chest enters the room before I do. I accept that for what it is. I get bumped and elbowed all the time, it happens, I'm used to it and doesn't bother me unless it's intentional. I have never had my ass accidentally on purpose fondled so many times during one shift, that's where I draw the line.

Don't get me wrong I'm not a prude but if I wanted to get groped by pervy old guys I would have become a prostitute, the money is better. I just don't feel that's appropriate for work. That's OK though because he was feeling up one of the servers and "SHE" turned out to be a "HE" with a boob job. This makes me laugh to no end. Wonder what he would say if he knew that he was feeling up some girl with a penis.

Thankfully I also got hired at the 3rd place I went to so I told the Chef there that *if* the position hadn't been filled within a few days and he still needed someone then I was all his. I was and am still OK with being a Sous Chef and I had a better feeling about this new place but I committed to starting a new job so I felt obligated to follow through. Thankfully the job was still mine so I gave it a go on Wed, MUCH better. There was several other things about that place that rubbed me the wrong way but I'm not even going to get into those. All I have to say is this: Just because it looks high end and classy in the dining room, doesn't mean that the kitchen where your expensive food comes from has the same appeal. Put it this way *I* didn't feel safe eating there. I'll just let you come to your own conclusions about that.

I will not lower my standards or sell myself short, because I'm good at what I do and I know it. I had one last shift on Tuesday, because I DO need to pay rent. If he touched me again, I would have broken his arm, then maybe he'll learn the meaning of DO NOT WANT! I am NOT going to be someone's squeeze toy. I'm not sorry I left, they didn't deserve any notice, and I had another job lined up so I wasn't worried. New place very much reminds me of my old job except here I have to work lol. I like it though, the staff is really cool. I'll likely never see my pay from that place, that's fine the labor board will love to hear about his escapades I'm sure. I'm thinking I should also get in touch with kitchen nightmares, Ramsey would have a field day in that place. The menu itself isn't bad but the environment it's made in is a whole other story!

Good lord!

The people who live above me are driving me nuts! They're either yelling and screaming until the wee hours of the morning, or stomping around like a herd of elephants because they're pissed at each other for something.

OR: people the know come by and instead of using the intercom like normal people would do, they stand in front of my bedroom window (I'm in the sub basement and their living room is above me) and scream until someone comes to the balcony door!

Do you really need to stand outside and have a conversation with them? Is there some reason why you'll be their friend but not go into their house?
I'm e-mailing my landlord and filing a complaint because this is getting ridiculous beyond all compare. Yet when my mom and aunt were here visiting, someone had the nerve to come to my living room window and tell us to shush! Can't come to my damn door though can you? WTF is wrong with you!

I start my new job today so at least I'll be out of the house and not having to listen to this shit. Work has me kind of freaked out since I haven't seen the menu or the kitchen yet and I'm supposed to be in charge. This is going to be interesting...

Creepy!

Technically this doesn't belong here per say but I had to post this because it's just nuts!

Like all pictures on here, you need to click on the picture to truly see it's size.



Would you be scared to drive across this bridge ?. ...

The Millau viaduct is part of the new E11 expressway connecting
Paris and Barcelona and features the highest bridge piers ever
constructed. The tallest is 240 meters (787 feet) high and the
overall height will be an impressive 336 meters (1102 feet), making
this the highest bridge in the world.

Ignorant people!

Holy shit, some people just fucking kill me seriously! Today is John's birthday and he's doing the family thing so we did the birthday thing together on Friday. So on Thursday I finally got off my derrière and decided where I was going to go and get John's gifts. So I went to EBgames
got his first gift card(they were great BTW) and I went to Simons to get his other one. I've never stepped foot into that place before and the chances of me stepping foot into there ever again are pretty much NIL...
The first person I spoke to was exceptionally helpful and really nice, kudos to her, although someone should show her how to put on mascara properly. Anyway after waiting in line behind a few yuppies returning things I finally got my turn. He was polite but I got one serious look of total disdain. It's not as if I showed up wearing this:


Or looked like this:

Not that it would have mattered anyway my damn money is just as good as anyone else's!
I asked for a gift card, I was promptly corrected by being told it was a gift certificate. Well la de fucking duh! Most people use gift cards now and days, whatever...

Snotty cashier guy: How much would you like on your card?
Me: $40.00 dollars please
Snotty cashier guy: gives me a look like I just asked him for a gift certificate with $2.50 cents on it.
me: I glared at him, gave him my money.
Snotty cashier guy: Takes his sweet old time filling it out by hand and then says to me " would you like to borrow my pen so that you can put the name in so that it matches the rest of the writing in this lovely green ink that matches so nicely?"
Me: yeah sure why not, he's sucking up enough of my time, might as well take some of his as well. I bet he dis-infected his pen after I left.
Snotty cashier guy: Do you know how our gift certificate's work?
Me: I just looked at him and was like WTF!?! Who doesn't know how to use a fucking gift card! I however said no I don't shop here enlighten me.
Snotty cashier guy: Gives me a once over and a looked that screamed yeah it looks as if you don't ever shop here. Then in a VERY condescending tone tells me about their return policy and the like.

Honestly I felt like Julia Robert's in that scene of pretty woman when she get's kicked out of a store after being told her kind don't belong there and then goes by later with a ton of shopping bags from high end stores.
Fucking ignorant cashier snotty prick wearing a fucking suit. Who in the hell do you think you are treating me like that! So needless to say, I have very little intentions of ever going back there. It's not like it's rodeo drive or something, buddy better learn to get over himself and damn fast! Just because I am (to coin a phrase from Clint) not a fashion plate. Of course, I looked on my receipt and of course the douche bags name ISN"T on the receipt. Whatever I'll take my money elsewhere cos I don't give a shit where my smoochiekins shops cos his clothes look better on my floor anyway!

Dear God!

I don't have much to write about these days mostly because I'm not doing what I was hired to do. Long story and totally not worth mentioning.

Maybe they'll fire my ass like Chartwell's did. Then again Chartwell's fired me based on Principle but they were waving my blog in my face, this of course is according to Benoit. Which is pronounced Ben-WA you know as in Ben WA balls ha ha!

Nice that I can talk freely about this, see they were just pissed because I spoke the truth of what working there is really like so let them try and come after me for libel because they can't Na Na Na Na FUCK YOU!

Apparently I dissed the managers, that's hilarious. Because I said they were wasting my cell phone minutes? Or how about the fact that they got sucked in by that pretty face and he ended up ripping off the company for hardcore amounts of money?

Can't fire me now can you fuckers! So Jacques you can go fuck yourself too OK. Yeah I just recently quit smoking, so i'm a little cranky. Deal with it :p

Bill gates telling it like it is.

I was having a similar conversation with someone earlier today and even though I can't stand him, the points are valid and totally worth sharing as well.

Rule 1: Life is not fair - get used to it!

Rule 2 : The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your
Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.


Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually
have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

Convience store horror & hillarioty ( another random rant)

This happened on Saturday but the events of the day were just too outrageous not to post. I scored the weekend off so I went to visit a friend in the west island. Stopped off at Arahova's for some food before I ran over to her place so we could have lunch together.

Since she's moving out, I figured i'll stop off at the dep near her house and pick up something to drink, that turned out to be a HUGE mistake. Generally it's not that busy when I go in there but this was the first time I had ventured in there on a Sat...

The door flew open and a ton of kids came flying out and some of them felt compelled to stand in the door and scream to their little friends and in turn blocking my path. Keep in mind that I have take out in my hands since there were no plastic bags to be had at the resturant. I was tempted to drop it on their heads but I wasn't about to waste it on them. The line up was a mile long and I thought well with the monsoon of kids, that was somewhat to be expected.
They all finally cleared out until this older woman walked up to the cash and held the line up for an additional 15 minutes on top of the time I wasted waiting for the little irritating children to leave. Turns out she didn't have enough money in her wallet. She even went as far to empty out her change purse on the counter all the while holding onto her dog so she was doing this one handed so that of course takes even longer. After figuring out that she didn't have enough money, she wanted to pay debit so the girl scans her card and the lady just looks at the debit machine and has no clue what her pin number is! So then on comes the search for credit cards and the like, she finally paid and dropped her cards, her check book and her dog almost took off in the process... I mean seriously, who beings their dog into a store? Let alone buys more stuff then they have money for. Seriously, that makes me even more glad that I don't work with the public anymore!

So Carly and I go out for dinner( hours later)... On the way back we made the mistake of going back into the same store to grab a few things. Once again another hold up... This one was different though, the poor woman was new and poorly trained. Fair enough, I can be sympathetic to that. There was a few people in line in front of us including a fake tanned frat boy along with a gaggle of his friends buying a case of beer for his limo ride. So poor woman at the cash is trying to fix a void, and has someone behind the counter trying to help her so she's not paying attention to the people in line and frat boy takes off with said case of beer. A customer points this out to the cashier and she takes off and starts screaming at frat boy to give her the case of beer back. Meanwhile this arrogant, wanna be a thug sucks his teeth and calls the other guy a snitch. Customer looks at him and says excuse me? You don't steal and has this little thug bastard cowering into the chip rack. He should have hit the little bastard for being so ignorant but he didn't and the cashier raced back into the store, case of beer in tow. I twas pretty entertaining overall. Finally someone who knew what they were doing showed up and we finally got served. I'll miss her when she moves, but not that damn dep!

Altho in happier news, I started a new job yet again but I have a better feeling about this one. My most favorite thing from my last job was convincing someone who is not familiar with French acronyms that SVP (which is please in case you didn't know) didn't stand for Si Vous plait ( or however that's spelled), but SUPER VAGINA POWER haha

I'm finally back!

Dear God, I didn't have a PC for the longest time so I had to put my rants on hold.
Going to mix things up though for a change and add the random funnies section just because I can. Besdies, if you work in the resturant/hospitality industry you NEED to laugh and often it's good for you.

I'm also going to start a resturant reviews page. This may include but not limited to: places I have worked along with places I have been to and places to just flat out avoid all together.

I missed having a PC, I am so happy to have one back again!
So stay tuned for up-dates folks because they are a coming!

Steph

My latest rant and an e-mail to share

You know I really loathe and despise when people come into my resturant and claim that they have allergies to something random like onions. Please! You honestly think that were dumb enough to buy into that bullshit, a simple no onions please would suffice. Yes of course there are people in the world whom I am sure allergic to onions and such but NOT that many people!

When your throwing your garbage out, get a fucking clue! If it's over flowing, move your lazy ass onto the second one located a mere half foot away from the other one. When i'm changing the garbage don't fucking line up behind me to wait, or attempt to throw your garbage in there when there isn't a bag in it either. Yes one of the hydro guys were about to do that, these people are supposed to take care of my hydro? Really not comforting, not in the least! Also jackass don't waltz in my resturant 5 minutes before closing an expect to sit there and fucking eat! Yes my french sucks ass and i'm sorry but I do try. However don't sit there and chew my ass out for it!

So movnig along, I got this great e-mail today and feel the need to pass it on because it is a gem!

Dear Employees:
It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals
throughout the company have been using foul language during the
course of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints
received from some employees who may be easily offended, this
type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to
accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.
Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases have been
provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in
an effective manner.

(1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the fuck you're doing.

(2) TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a fucking bitch.

(3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the fuck do you expect me to do this?

(4) TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No fucking way.

(5) TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be shitting me!

(6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a shit.

(7) TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my fucking problem.

(8) TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the fuck?

(9) TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This shit won't work.

(10) TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the fuck didn't you tell me sooner?

(11) TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his ass.

(12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat shit and die.

(13) TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my ass.

(14) TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: Fuck it, I'm on salary.

(15) TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your ass.

(16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This fucking job sucks.

(17) TRY SAYING: You want ME to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the fuck died and made you boss?

(18) TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a prick.

Thank You,

Human Resources

it's been a while...

And it will continue to be a while because I am without a PC dammit! I am also boderline poor at the moment, so I won't be able to up-date for a while. I am going home for christmas though so I can use my mom's computer thank God!

Anyway in the meantime, happy holidays to all of my readers regardless of how you celebrate it!

Get smashed, enjoy the snow and irritate your friends by buying them sex toys ;)

Bring on the hatered!

So Sunday I have a "disscussion" with my boss...

He wants me to do more!!!!! WTF, I DO EVERYTHING as it is, do you want my left fucking arm too while your at it??????

So they finally discovered that I know how to cook, so they want me up front at all times doing the set-ups and what not. I was told by 2 different managers not to do any cleaning IE: the floors and things because we hired a new guy to do all that stuff! So what do I do? Don't do it lol.

What happens because of that? He calls one of the owners and cry's to him and wanted me fired because I didn't clean the floor when I was TOLD NOT TO! Seriously what the hell is wrong with people! Granted we have some serious cultural differences which are creating obvious conflicts. He keeps fishing for excuses to get me to do more work without actually getting paid more yet he dangles the proverbial money carott in my face ALL the time. I ain't buying into that BS, no thanks jackass, get a clue then we'll talk some!

So after I found that out I started looking for a new job, spent 1/2 hour on the phone with the exec Chef of a better paying resturant who's looking for head cooks and he seems impressed with me, he actually said as much. So Monday I go for an interivew, keep your fingers and toes crossed for me!

Also one of the chef's at work has taken/hitting on me too far! Can we say sexual harrassment. He grabbed my ass, finds ANY excuse to rub up against me and has been calling me honey all day.

Good, I can go after them when I quit! My PC has the speed of a snail these days so I can't up-date much until I install more ram.

Random rant...

I hate people I really do, the food service industry blows and totally sucks ass! I asked for my raise and so far haven't gotten it yet of course...

Their excuse: we can't afford to give you more money. So that being said you get what you pay for, nothing more, nothing less. You want me to work harder for my shitty money you fucks? Are you out of your GODAMMNED MIND!

No, so everyone someone asks me to do something I just reply with no, I don't get paid enough and walk away. You want me to stay late because you have no one to close, I'll laugh in your face like I did last Friday! If anything, at least THAT behaviour is a legitaimate reason for getting fired. Keeping a blog not so much...

People are senseless and total pigs as well. Yes please don't take the extra 2 seconds to walk over to the other garbage because your too fucking lazy! Just keep cramming more shit in there, we like that...{insert heavily loaded sarcasam here}

Yes please do leave your shit all over the floor and the tables because your obviously a slob that doesn't know how to clean up after themselves. Do you live in a trailor?

No class...

Next person that bitches at me for being english and not speaking french: NEWSFLASH TWAT IT'S THE WEST ISLAND AND THIS IS CANADA LEARN SOME FUCKING ENGLISH YOU SEPEREIST WHORE!

Whew, I feel better now! If I was so tired from my crappy sweat shop wages resturant job i'd up-date as soon as I got home from work.

Feel like eating out tonight? READ this FIRST!

The next time you're out eating at a resturant, look at your server. Do you think they are really happy to be doing that job? The answer is no, they are not, but it's what we do, and we do it for the money so please help them out. Its a tougher job than you think and you should pay them accordingly!

There are SO many people out there flooding the restaurants w/o any knowledge of how to tip. Here is a short guide for the general public to follow. Feel free to print out and store in your wallet and/or purse.

1. CHILDREN "THE LITTLE DEVILS": If you have children, DO NOT let them, open and dump anything on the table (ie; salt, sugar, etc). IF YOU DO, you must leave an extra $5 for the server to clean up YOUR CHILD'S mess & to restock the now unusable wasted items. We are neither their babysitter nor their parent. The least you can do is pay us for the extra work. Also make sure you control your kids and don't let them scream or run around the restraunt. It's very distracting not to mention dangerous if they get ran over by a server with hot food in their hands.

2. "THE CAMPERS": If you feel the necessity to stay for longer than 15 minutes after you pay, its an extra $3 every 30 minutes. We make our money from the tables. If you are in one and we can't seat it, we don't make money.

3. COMPLIMENTS: Telling a server they are the best server they've ever had is not a tip. If we are good, let us know by leaving us more money. We cant pay our bills on compliments. Its not that we don't appreciate the praise, its just that if you say that and then leave 10% it's an insult.

4. THE SALVATION PAMPHLETS: Prayer cards and any other religious pamphlet is NOT a tip. It is insulting that you assume we are w/o religion and must save us. Again, like ..3, we cant pay bills w/prayer cards. We'd go to church on Sundays if it wasn't mandatory to work on Sundays because EVERYONE who goes to church follows it by eating out.

5. TIPPING: It is not 1960. Cost of living has gone up dramatically since then. 18% is the MINIMUM amount of what you should be tipping your servers. Just look at the tax line and multiply by 2-3, this gives you your minimum tip amount. Remember, our companies pay us minimum wage (minumum wage for servers is $6.75 in CA, $3.13 in FL, $3.09 in IA, $2.13 in TX) And we are taxed on 10 percent of your meal automatically anyway. So if your meal is $100 and you leave $10 and we tip out $4-5 to the busser, bartender, and whoever else then we pay tax on 10 dollars and we make $5. It seems small but it adds up. How many times do you eat out per week and do this?

6. THE COMPLAINERS: If you get a discount because of your food was prepared wrong or something, do not take it out of our tip. We didn't cook it. The cooks get paid hourly regardless if the food sucks. However, we only make what you give us.

7. THE FREE STUFF: If you happen to get anything for free and you did not have a problem with your dining experience, most of the time it is because the server thinks you will realize that they are giving it to you for free. There should be extra tip thanking the server for the free item. They could get in a lot of trouble giving away free stuff. You should give them hazard pay for it.

8. THE LATE ONES: If you come into the restraunt 10 mins before closing or any time near closing hurry up and order your food and get out. Closed means closed, not social hour. It is so rude to sit there and take your sweet ass time. We can't leave until you leave because we have to do sidework and clean the table you are sitting at. We don't want to stand there waiting for you for an extra hour just because you don't want to go home. We recommend 24 hour establishments such as Dennys if you wish to sit into the wee hours of the night.

9. THE TABLE HOGGERS: If you only come in for coffee or a dessert, to do paper work, or to have a meeting, don't sit there taking up our booths for hours. We are not Starbucks or a hotel restraunt. If you want to sit for hours, go there or else you better leave a good tip for us and camping fee included.

10. THE GREET: When we come up to the table to greet you and we ask how you are doing please let us know. We honestly want to know how you are doing. If you are in a bad mood we want to know that from the beginning. A confused stare or complete silence does not suffice as a reply to "How are you doing?". Also most of us are REQUIRED to say certain things during the greeting, so please don't interrupt our greeting and say "I want coffee", "Can we get some bread?", or "What are the soups?"

11. THOSE DAMN CELL PHONES: Don't ever talk on your cell phone in a restraunt. This is probably the rudest thing to do. If you must be on your cell, at least keep your voice down in respect for other customers. If you are on your cell phone when we walk up to greet your table we will walk away and not return until you get off your phone. Just show some respect and give us your attention for a couple of minutes.

12. TAKE-AWAY OR TO-GOS: Always remember to tip the take-out order servers! They work just as hard as a server, and hardly ever get tips for it! WE DESERVE TO BE TIPPED TOO!

RESTAURANT WORKERS READING THIS:
Please repost this so the word can get out, since so many people are uneducated about tips and our lives depend on this - at least for now......

SIGNED, YOUR FELLOW RESTAURANTEUR

Started my new job...

Oh wow, you know when you work somewhere especially if it's food related I get rather nazi like about certain things.

However I must say that even though I am not a fan of sushi the other style food we carry there is exceptionally good and I really like it :)

Not liking my job too much, then again I just hate being new and having everyone and their mother talk down to you and such. So we'll see how it all works out and all that jazz...

Funny story though I found out what my tattoos mean in another language, since they are kanji symbols they can be translated into 2 different languages and in chinese my tattoos mean evil and lustful and I love it lol

Had some guy come in today and he was overtly flambouant and REALLY drunk and beyond hillarious, he totally made my afternoon!

The one thing that I don't like aobut my job too much is the lack of recycling that we do. As in none, so i'm going to get on my bosses ass about that because there's no need for us to have that much freaking garbage!

That was one thing I or most likely the only thing I could respect about my old job, at least it recycled and what not.

pointless up-date...

So I got a new job, this is something entirely new for me so we'll see what happens and how that all goes.

I have a fairly good idea about who ratted me out, but still can't confirm it 100% but i'll find out eventually. I know that I will.

In other news my rather creepy roomate is moving down towards my end of the house and that's well not cool to say the least...

I really have nothing else to comment on for the moment, I just felt compelled to at least attempt to write something, even if it is mundane and somewhat lame lol

ok what?

I should change my blog's name to I hate stupid people...

Ok granted not everyone is stupid but some people I tell you, just aren't that bright. We all have our moments, myself included...

However, had a job interview this week that I feel compelled to share with you all. Now I got the call back for an interview several days ago but had to put it off because I was ill and well as you all know, nothing says hire me more then coughing up gobs of phelm during an interview! Well apparently the induvidual I had an appointment with at a very high end establishment I might add, apparently forgot. Once the excecutive chef was in front of me his confusion was apparent, he even asked me what exactly did he call me for. So needless to say I walked out of there thinking to myself WTF? I mean seriously how un-organized can you be? I understand that i'm just an induvidual on paper but they called me for an interview so it was apparent that something in my resume caught their attention, right???? No apparently that's not the case...

I also got another rather exciting, not to mention exceptionally well paying job that was my former company's biggest competition. Needless to say I wanted that job one becuase of the money of course it was 6/hour more then what I was making for half the work, not to mention that working for them just would have been a kick in the face to my old company which would have in effect been almost better the sex! However given the part of town that it was in and not to mention the start time of 5am I had to decline which was un-fortunate. However they did assure me that they would hold onto my CV in the event that other opportunity's arise that make it a little easier for me to get into work, since I don't drive.

Stay tuned!